Being at the park today, I was hit with a little pang of "oh my goodness, this boy is growing up way too fast". All of the things he can do this year at the park as opposed to last.
The way when I ask, "Everett, do you need help?" and I get the response, "No mama, I can do it. Don't help" or, "No, I do it all by myself. I don't need mama's help".
While it excites me so much, this new adventure of independence he is on, it also selfishly saddens me because I want him to NEED me forever. When he grows into a young sprouting adolescent, with a squeaky voice, body odor and girl friends--how do I know he needs me then?
Thank goodness this all happens over a span of 18+ years--it'll make it easier to cope with I think, because now it just breaks me inside to think that this little adventurous boy of mine will soon belong to the world...to his school....to his work...to another woman.
For now though, we shall continue to have spontaneous dates to the park, hot wheels car races, and jumping on the bed sessions a midst the "No, I can do it with out mama" and growing independence of my adventurous, free spirited little warrior.
Because when you know that you have the power to make his pain go away with just a loving kiss and tight squeeze, I think--I hope- that will to translate into something even bigger and better when he is growing into a man.
What will this boy show us next?
"I'll love you forever,
I'll like you for always,
As long as I'm living
My baby you'll be."