Thursday, July 5, 2012


There are times where as a working mom, I feel as if I am on a teeter totter balancing my priorities, desires and passions in life up and down--back and forth.  One week I am convinced I should be a stay at home mom and the next there is nothing I want more than to spend all my time, energy and heart into my job as a counselor.  It gets real taxing on my mind and  on my heart.  I think God knows this though---well, actually I KNOW he knows.  It's these times where I doubt my roles that he comes in and affirms what I am doing. 

Even though summer is still in its beginning stages,  I'm already falling hard for the 24/7 time with Everett and find little seeds of dread creeping their way in my mind when I think of work starting in the fall--which is crazy because I adore and LOVE my job!  God has given me two amazing roles as mother and counselor and while I feel blessed, I also feel like I constantly have to choose.  Where does this come from?  I don't know.  Will it ever stop?  Not sure of that either.  What I am sure of though is that when I start to doubt myself and my God-given roles, God comes in and uses something to affirm me and keep my head and heart in the game.

This evening, I received an email from a former student I worked with this past year (now a 7th grader)--it totally warmed my heart and fueled my love and desire for my amazing job!  Here is what the student wrote:

What a sweet kiddo, huh?!

I thank God for using affirmations like this in my life because they drive me to be better at what he has destined for me.  And while I am not sure if the conflicting feeling of this balancing act will ever go away, I would much rather be balancing these two great roles than none at all!

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