Monday, April 23, 2012

Ask Mom: Filling the Nest.

So, it is about that time that Curtis and I are starting to think and talk about planning for our next baby (God willing!)  Where this excites me and I cannot wait, it also puts a little seed of guilt in my mind that I can't quite get rid of.  It all seems pretty ridiculous in my brain--but maybe, just maybe there are other ridiculous mama's out there who feel the same way...

See, I feel guilty because Everett is our one and only. Just like we cannot imagine our lives without him, it is hard for me to imagine our lives with another little one that will need our attention too--in turn taking some of that from Everett.  It just feels like it will be unfair to my sweet boy to take some attention away from him and put it on someone else.  I know when he is older he will LOVE that sibling relationship, but what about now when he doesn't quite get it.  Will he wonder if we don't love him as much?  Will he feel forgotten?  Will he feel ignored?  Will he feel second place?

Just like it was a blessing to bring Everett into our lives, it will be an incredible blessing to have more little ones to call our own!  However, I can't help but think of the guilt ridden what-ifs and wonder how it will affect my sweet boy.  Will these thoughts deter me from having more kids? No.  Do they make me a little emotional and cray cray? Yes!

For those whom have multiple or are planning to have multiple children, have you every had these thoughts? --- if so, how did you overcome them and how did it change your relationship with your firstborn?

2 comments:

  1. He will be a fantastic big brother! They always love to help. All of the sudden they are not a baby any more but the big helper.

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  2. Oh Laura. Been there. Only my firstborn was really still quite the baby (at 14 months when my second was born). I'll never forget walking around with just Greta, and a very full pregnant tummy, and thinking, she'll never get to be the baby again. She'll always have to be the "big kid" from here on out. And we'll never get alone time with her again. And then, Audrey was born, and it was beautiful. We all have found our rhythm, now 16 months later, and we get plenty of alone time with each daughter. Both girls have found special relationships with people outside of our family which has helped them feel more loved than we can imagine.
    It's tricky to picture but God has a plan- so excited to see what happens with your little family!

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